The Love Dare

I had heard about this book from a friend of mine. It's a Christianity-based book that challenges you to do a 40-day "love dare" to (hopefully) strengthen your marriage.

John and I are pretty happily married (no complaints from my end) and so far we haven't had any major issues, but I can definitely see us falling into a bit of a rut. We've been married for almost 7 years now so it's not like we're still feeling butterflies in our stomachs when we see each other. We don't even have kids (which I know is a huge added stress to relationships) but sometimes I come home from work and we barely say three sentences to each other before we go to bed.

Our conversations go something like this:

me: hey babe, I'm home.
J: hey! [as he continues to play his first-person-shooter game from the den]

I go upstairs to change into my sweatpants and big t-shirt. I come back downstairs.

me (yelling into the den as I rummage through the fridge): what do you feel like eating for dinner?
J (hollering back from the den): I don't care, whatever you want to make

then I cook dinner and call him to dinner. He comes out of the den. We turn on the TV and sit down to eat.

I eat faster than J, so I clear my dishes, grab the laptop and make myself comfortable on the couch. J finishes his meal, clears his dishes and either goes back to play more Call of Duty or he sits on the couch with me and we bicker over what show to watch.

So it's not like we don't get along, we get along fine. We don't have major issues and there's still a lot of love there, but I can easily see how this could head down an ugly path if I don't snap out of it.

Soooo, since it's a new year, I figured this "love dare" might be something interesting to try out. What have I got to lose, right?

I'm on Day #2. My dare from Day #1 was to go the entire day without saying anything mean to J. Easy Peasy.

I don't think you're actually supposed to tell your spouse that you're doing this "love dare", so I haven't told him about it... but at the end of the night as we were in bed, I couldn't help but ask him,"babe, just out of curiosity... did I say or do anything mean to you today?"

He gave me a funny look but just replied,"nope". So far so good! :-)

Today's dare is to again not to do or say anything mean to J, and to also add an unexpected act of kindness. I'm having trouble thinking of something to do. He's always asking me to take a bigger interest in our finances, so maybe I'll pay some bills tonight. Or is that lame? hmmm... maybe i'll offer him a back massage!

I'll report back tomorrow...